Best Advice Ever - Eat good food, be kind and tell the truth.

I've been cruising the internet for interesting blogs the last few days.  Heartiste (hate the name), had a commenter who posted a link to a woman's blog,  I landed and then cruised to a number of women's sites.  Ordinarily the largest majority of blogs I visit are from men's points of view - exception Bhetti, Rebekah and Sofia (sidebar links).   So I ended up on a ladies blog, won't mention the name to protect the person, and found it pretty interesting, good writing and she has an attractive personality.  The posts I read were about a woman (her) having a relationship with a guy who told her he didn't want a relationship, but likes her for... 'you know'.  So she was 'you knowing' with him, and it was great, if not amazing 'you know'.  Girls were weighing in on the comments saying she shouldn't count on him yada yada yada, and other girls saying "you go girlfriend!".   I felt sad when I read it because it showed me how deluded we women are about our worth to men.  We think that if we're awesome in bed and the chemistry is right, he WILL fall in love with us.  If he dumps us we think we're the best he's ever going to get. We D E L U D E ourselves.  She admits to growing feelings and I feel like I can see the end and it's not pretty.

Today she wrote a post on being a bridesmaid in an upcoming wedding and how upset she was about her size and how she knew she'd look.  I realized then this girl wasn't slender or curvy, she was fat.  She wasn't happy about her fat either.  I also figured out why she may be still single and why the dude is interested in hitting it, but not 'being' with it.

I wrote a well intentioned comment.  Said I'd been bigger once upon a time and found a great way to eat and knew she could do it.  (She'd complained about not being able to stick diets in her post).  I told her that she owed it to herself and her future man. I told her the truth about how men really are visual creatures and that biologically they want women who look fertile and what fertility looks like i.e. waist to hip ratio wise.  I told her this current guy was never going to stick around and that I felt she knew that already.

You can see where this is going right?

I was put in moderation. And then my comment was deleted.  It's not going to see the light of day and I know there are women who go to her site who need the truth too.  Hell she needs the truth!

Point of this is I know she's been reading a lot of my posts.  I want her to read this one.  I want her to know I mean well and that rather than running from the truth, why not choose to run into it!  The cliche the truth will set you free is true.

I ended my comment positively, as I'm won't to do, and told her just the act of starting would lose her 10lbs of mental weight.  Guess she's more comfortable carrying it around.

To the blog writer I'm sorry you felt what you felt and what caused you not to post my comment.  I really did mean well, it wasn't meant to be sanctimonious advice.  I wanted to help .  If you'd like to tell me why in a private email why you wouldn't post it and how I may have offended you, that would be welcome.  aoefeansar@gmail.com  (I have no intention of a flame war and will not tell anyone where your blog is, don't want any haters and/or other well meaning people to bother you).  This post was public only because I know you're reading my blog and I wanted another chance to speak to you and have you think about what I said.

So best advice - Eat Good Food (the gist of my comment), Be Kind (was really aiming for that), and Tell the Truth (it hurts sometimes, but it's important to tell it).

The end.

Best Advice Ever - Eat good food, be kind and tell the truth.

I've been cruising the internet for interesting blogs the last few days.  Heartiste (hate the name), had a commenter who posted a link to a woman's blog,  I landed and then cruised to a number of women's sites.  Ordinarily the largest majority of blogs I visit are from men's points of view - exception Bhetti, Rebekah and Sofia (sidebar links).   So I ended up on a ladies blog, won't mention the name to protect the person, and found it pretty interesting, good writing and she has an attractive personality.  The posts I read were about a woman (her) having a relationship with a guy who told her he didn't want a relationship, but likes her for... 'you know'.  So she was 'you knowing' with him, and it was great, if not amazing 'you know'.  Girls were weighing in on the comments saying she shouldn't count on him yada yada yada, and other girls saying "you go girlfriend!".   I felt sad when I read it because it showed me how deluded we women are about our worth to men.  We think that if we're awesome in bed and the chemistry is right, he WILL fall in love with us.  If he dumps us we think we're the best he's ever going to get. We D E L U D E ourselves.  She admits to growing feelings and I feel like I can see the end and it's not pretty.

Today she wrote a post on being a bridesmaid in an upcoming wedding and how upset she was about her size and how she knew she'd look.  I realized then this girl wasn't slender or curvy, she was fat.  She wasn't happy about her fat either.  I also figured out why she may be still single and why the dude is interested in hitting it, but not 'being' with it.

I wrote a well intentioned comment.  Said I'd been bigger once upon a time and found a great way to eat and knew she could do it.  (She'd complained about not being able to stick diets in her post).  I told her that she owed it to herself and her future man. I told her the truth about how men really are visual creatures and that biologically they want women who look fertile and what fertility looks like i.e. waist to hip ratio wise.  I told her this current guy was never going to stick around and that I felt she knew that already.

You can see where this is going right?

I was put in moderation. And then my comment was deleted.  It's not going to see the light of day and I know there are women who go to her site who need the truth too.  Hell she needs the truth!

Point of this is I know she's been reading a lot of my posts.  I want her to read this one.  I want her to know I mean well and that rather than running from the truth, why not choose to run into it!  The cliche the truth will set you free is true.

I ended my comment positively, as I'm won't to do, and told her just the act of starting would lose her 10lbs of mental weight.  Guess she's more comfortable carrying it around.

To the blog writer I'm sorry you felt what you felt and what caused you not to post my comment.  I really did mean well, it wasn't meant to be sanctimonious advice.  I wanted to help .  If you'd like to tell me why in a private email why you wouldn't post it and how I may have offended you, that would be welcome.  aoefeansar@gmail.com  (I have no intention of a flame war and will not tell anyone where your blog is, don't want any haters and/or other well meaning people to bother you).  This post was public only because I know you're reading my blog and I wanted another chance to speak to you and have you think about what I said.

So best advice - Eat Good Food (the gist of my comment), Be Kind (was really aiming for that), and Tell the Truth (it hurts sometimes, but it's important to tell it).

The end.

Food for thought and beauty.

I have been paying specific attention to what I eat for a little over 12 months. I've dieted my whole life, but have more or less watched calorie consumption rather than what I ate.  Last year Roissy talked about Paleo eating and a few readers backed him up, my curiosity was piqued.  At first I thought it was raw food eating and I thought there would be no way I'd eat my food raw.  Once I discovered the principals and researched what to eat I went for it.  I ate a 99% pure Paleo diet for five months and lost a lot of inches.  I don't weigh myself because of what it does to my mental state, but I did drop three dress sizes.  I slowly started introducing non-paleo foods to see how my body handled them and sure enough I slowly started putting weight back on.

I recently was called HUSKY! in front of my man by an old man and this was all the wake-up call I needed to get back on the food wagon.  I didn't go back to Paleo I opted instead for the Ultra Simple Diet to detox and see how I did.  The only real difference that I can see is they don't mind protein powders, rice or flax.  I don't eat gluten grains, processed sugar, dairy or red meat in abundance.

I felt better almost immediately. I bloat terribly with diary or gluten, removing those gut irritants makes me look like I've lost 5 lbs the first week.  Many people commented on my weight loss, when for me it's simply loss of bloat.

It's a disciplined way of eating to be sure.  One has to be committed to substituting and planning in order to make it through restaurants and family occasions.  One week at a time is the best way I've found for me to attack it.  My man is away and I thought it would be a perfect time to get serious.  I walk about 3 miles a day, do a boot camp class every week and eat very clean.  I've dropped a dress size since he left. Plus I firmed up the booty a nice side benefit.

I've read Good Calories Bad Calories by Gary Taubes.  It's one you really have to wade through, but great information.  If you like research, this is a must read.  I've linked to a site which has summarized the book for you.  Mark's Daily Apple is a great place to get started in the Paleo lifestyle if you're curious.

What goes on in the inside of us is reflected on the outside.  Eating well, exercising and striving for a balanced life will add to your beauty.  Food is where it starts, you can't possible exercise enough without also changing your food to make a signifiant difference.  I found by eating Paleo I wasn't hungry, I didn't have to white knuckle through it and I lost cravings I thought I'd have forever.

Well I'll get off my soapbox and simply add encouragement.  You can do this.  You can feel better in a short amount of time.  You will look better, have patience.  It's a journey, don't go nuts trying to arrive tomorrow.

Food for thought and beauty.

I have been paying specific attention to what I eat for a little over 12 months. I've dieted my whole life, but have more or less watched calorie consumption rather than what I ate.  Last year Roissy talked about Paleo eating and a few readers backed him up, my curiosity was piqued.  At first I thought it was raw food eating and I thought there would be no way I'd eat my food raw.  Once I discovered the principals and researched what to eat I went for it.  I ate a 99% pure Paleo diet for five months and lost a lot of inches.  I don't weigh myself because of what it does to my mental state, but I did drop three dress sizes.  I slowly started introducing non-paleo foods to see how my body handled them and sure enough I slowly started putting weight back on.

I recently was called HUSKY! in front of my man by an old man and this was all the wake-up call I needed to get back on the food wagon.  I didn't go back to Paleo I opted instead for the Ultra Simple Diet to detox and see how I did.  The only real difference that I can see is they don't mind protein powders, rice or flax.  I don't eat gluten grains, processed sugar, dairy or red meat in abundance.

I felt better almost immediately. I bloat terribly with diary or gluten, removing those gut irritants makes me look like I've lost 5 lbs the first week.  Many people commented on my weight loss, when for me it's simply loss of bloat.

It's a disciplined way of eating to be sure.  One has to be committed to substituting and planning in order to make it through restaurants and family occasions.  One week at a time is the best way I've found for me to attack it.  My man is away and I thought it would be a perfect time to get serious.  I walk about 3 miles a day, do a boot camp class every week and eat very clean.  I've dropped a dress size since he left. Plus I firmed up the booty a nice side benefit.

I've read Good Calories Bad Calories by Gary Taubes.  It's one you really have to wade through, but great information.  If you like research, this is a must read.  I've linked to a site which has summarized the book for you.  Mark's Daily Apple is a great place to get started in the Paleo lifestyle if you're curious.

What goes on in the inside of us is reflected on the outside.  Eating well, exercising and striving for a balanced life will add to your beauty.  Food is where it starts, you can't possible exercise enough without also changing your food to make a signifiant difference.  I found by eating Paleo I wasn't hungry, I didn't have to white knuckle through it and I lost cravings I thought I'd have forever.

Well I'll get off my soapbox and simply add encouragement.  You can do this.  You can feel better in a short amount of time.  You will look better, have patience.  It's a journey, don't go nuts trying to arrive tomorrow.

Hot, Not and a Going to Be

Cream coloured pants are from my BIGGEST days, leather pants are from my rock star days when I was a teeny-tiny stage hottie.

I think it's humanly impossible to jump into those leathers again, I was 21 and that says it all.

Fortunately I'm not the larger size anymore (haven't been for a long time) and am working myself into a sweet spot, which will lie somewhere in the middle of the two.  Photo to the right is me today holding up my fat pants.  I was depressed in a relationship with the wrong man and tried to eat myself happy. Plus I thought it didn't matter how I looked once I had a man who loved me.  (dumb dumb dumb)

The larger pants are size 14 and the leather ones are  a 4.  I was 34, 24, 34 when I wore them.  Hot, hot, smokin' hot.  No wonder the dude who snapped me up did.  If only I'd known how damn much market value I had then.

The good news is I'm much closer to hot than not because I work it!  Yay!

(I hope this is an inspiring post to women, if I can do it, so can you.)

Hot, Not and a Going to Be

Cream coloured pants are from my BIGGEST days, leather pants are from my rock star days when I was a teeny-tiny stage hottie.

I think it's humanly impossible to jump into those leathers again, I was 21 and that says it all.

Fortunately I'm not the larger size anymore (haven't been for a long time) and am working myself into a sweet spot, which will lie somewhere in the middle of the two.  Photo to the right is me today holding up my fat pants.  I was depressed in a relationship with the wrong man and tried to eat myself happy. Plus I thought it didn't matter how I looked once I had a man who loved me.  (dumb dumb dumb)

The larger pants are size 14 and the leather ones are  a 4.  I was 34, 24, 34 when I wore them.  Hot, hot, smokin' hot.  No wonder the dude who snapped me up did.  If only I'd known how damn much market value I had then.

The good news is I'm much closer to hot than not because I work it!  Yay!

(I hope this is an inspiring post to women, if I can do it, so can you.)

Breakfast at Aoefe's

Back on the healthy wagon today.  Being called husky in front of my boyfriend was a gift in disguise. I'm not husky per se, but I'm not my ideal, bootylicious size.

I'm following the UltraSimple Diet because a friend of mine had some great success with it.  It's similar to Primal but does allow me to have rice, which is a bonus!

Picture is my breakfast.

Hot water with 1/2 organic lemon juice squeezed into it to start.

Smoothie with:
Flax seed oil - 1 tablespoon
Flax seeds      - 1 tablespoon (would be better ground but I don't have a grinder)
Rice Protein Powder - 1 heaping tablespoon (vanilla flavoured)
Almond Milk - 1/2 cup.  I'll change this to water once I lose a few pounds, but now it's calorie reduction and when I need to kick it up because I'll be thinner I'll switch.
Berries - handfull of blueberries, strawberries and raspberries.
Banana - 1/2 frozen banana
Vitamin C - 1/4 teaspoon powder
My girlfriend adds spinach to her smoothie, I plan on trying that.

I also take Magnesium Citrate, Vitamin K, a probiotic and a liver detoxifying herb.

Throughout the day I drink an organic vegetable broth, a minimum of three cups per day.

Lunch is two cups of steamed or sauteed vegetables and 1/2 cup of brown rice.

Supper is either chicken or salmon with vegetables and rice (1/2 cup).

If you're hungry you can have more broth and/or another shake without the flax oil and fibre.

Sorry for the boring details, but some of you may be interested.

I've been sugar and wheat free for a week now and feel better mentally, likely due to taking back control of my eating.  The above is a 7-day detox plan, I plan on going longer than 7 days, because it's food I like and I want the best results.

I'm frustrated with myself because last summer at this time I looked and felt better.  But...I'm not going to cry over spilt milk, it's time to kick ass again.  I have been exercising regularly in a small group with a personal trainer which is very beneficial.

I'm excited about being on the health trail again!

Breakfast at Aoefe's

Back on the healthy wagon today.  Being called husky in front of my boyfriend was a gift in disguise. I'm not husky per se, but I'm not my ideal, bootylicious size.

I'm following the UltraSimple Diet because a friend of mine had some great success with it.  It's similar to Primal but does allow me to have rice, which is a bonus!

Picture is my breakfast.

Hot water with 1/2 organic lemon juice squeezed into it to start.

Smoothie with:
Flax seed oil - 1 tablespoon
Flax seeds      - 1 tablespoon (would be better ground but I don't have a grinder)
Rice Protein Powder - 1 heaping tablespoon (vanilla flavoured)
Almond Milk - 1/2 cup.  I'll change this to water once I lose a few pounds, but now it's calorie reduction and when I need to kick it up because I'll be thinner I'll switch.
Berries - handfull of blueberries, strawberries and raspberries.
Banana - 1/2 frozen banana
Vitamin C - 1/4 teaspoon powder
My girlfriend adds spinach to her smoothie, I plan on trying that.

I also take Magnesium Citrate, Vitamin K, a probiotic and a liver detoxifying herb.

Throughout the day I drink an organic vegetable broth, a minimum of three cups per day.

Lunch is two cups of steamed or sauteed vegetables and 1/2 cup of brown rice.

Supper is either chicken or salmon with vegetables and rice (1/2 cup).

If you're hungry you can have more broth and/or another shake without the flax oil and fibre.

Sorry for the boring details, but some of you may be interested.

I've been sugar and wheat free for a week now and feel better mentally, likely due to taking back control of my eating.  The above is a 7-day detox plan, I plan on going longer than 7 days, because it's food I like and I want the best results.

I'm frustrated with myself because last summer at this time I looked and felt better.  But...I'm not going to cry over spilt milk, it's time to kick ass again.  I have been exercising regularly in a small group with a personal trainer which is very beneficial.

I'm excited about being on the health trail again!

Getting my groove back

Week number 2 of Primal eating.  Feeling better mentally.  I'm looking a little slimmer too, but that's water weight.  If you don't eat many carbs, you don't hold on to water.  My biggest issue is drinking enough water - I don't really like the stuff. 

I'm in the midst of renos at my house as you can see by the paint can at my feet.  I haven't had a shower in my home for two weeks!  The bathroom will look gorgello when done, but honestly I had NO idea that it would take this long.  I may be being raped.  Single womanhood sucks. 

Getting my groove back

Week number 2 of Primal eating.  Feeling better mentally.  I'm looking a little slimmer too, but that's water weight.  If you don't eat many carbs, you don't hold on to water.  My biggest issue is drinking enough water - I don't really like the stuff. 

I'm in the midst of renos at my house as you can see by the paint can at my feet.  I haven't had a shower in my home for two weeks!  The bathroom will look gorgello when done, but honestly I had NO idea that it would take this long.  I may be being raped.  Single womanhood sucks. 

Half Naked Thursday once again

I knew what would make me feel better. Posting a half naked Thursday pic! It's been awhile. Besides I want to prove Primal eating is da bomb. I'm really, truly pleased with the changes in my bod these last nine weeks. I can't believe nine weeks have gone so fast honestly. I'm becoming a poster child for this WOE (way of eating) in my circle of influence. I hope to have some real converts - I'd love to have them feel as good as I do.

Specific weight loss areas I'm pleased about are back fat and side boobage fat. My athletic thighs (code for fat) have some ways to go, but are much smaller believe it or not. I'm hoping I don't lose the booteh. I kinda like it. This side shot shows how much slimmer I'm getting in width, gotta admit I love it!

Primal on my friends!

Half Naked Thursday once again

I knew what would make me feel better. Posting a half naked Thursday pic! It's been awhile. Besides I want to prove Primal eating is da bomb. I'm really, truly pleased with the changes in my bod these last nine weeks. I can't believe nine weeks have gone so fast honestly. I'm becoming a poster child for this WOE (way of eating) in my circle of influence. I hope to have some real converts - I'd love to have them feel as good as I do.

Specific weight loss areas I'm pleased about are back fat and side boobage fat. My athletic thighs (code for fat) have some ways to go, but are much smaller believe it or not. I'm hoping I don't lose the booteh. I kinda like it. This side shot shows how much slimmer I'm getting in width, gotta admit I love it!

Primal on my friends!