The relationship is over.
Nothing dramatic. It ended in text conversation. Which is not how I pictured it would go down.
I finally called him out on behaviour. Friday night he said he'd call and I waited up. Again - this wasn't the first time it had happened. He had a shitty excuse i.e. phone was charging in his car. And I said I was hurt. I said that his use of the word Love had meaning to me. I said Love meant Action. Action meant Caring. And caring meant he called when he said he would or as I said he would have at the very least let me know not to wait up his phone needed a charge. I told him I felt like my patience had worked against me.
For context I need to tell you guys that a significant event had happened to me that day, a very good news day for me. I had text him a couple times during the day to share the news and had not heard back in reply. At 8:30 PM I'd said "um". He answered right away and said he was out for dinner with a guy and would call me when he got home. At 10:15 PM I text and asked if he'd gone to bed because normally he does at 9:30 PM. He text back and said he was still out. I replied "Wow that's late!". And he said "Yes, babe". I waited until 11:05 PM and then I went to bed. I said in a text that I didn't understand how he couldn't spare five minutes for a phone call due to great news and said I was feeling hurt. The next morning at 9:00 AM was a text from him saying, "gm, I charged the phone in my car sorry. How r u?". And the rest I've written about above.
For context I need to tell you guys that a significant event had happened to me that day, a very good news day for me. I had text him a couple times during the day to share the news and had not heard back in reply. At 8:30 PM I'd said "um". He answered right away and said he was out for dinner with a guy and would call me when he got home. At 10:15 PM I text and asked if he'd gone to bed because normally he does at 9:30 PM. He text back and said he was still out. I replied "Wow that's late!". And he said "Yes, babe". I waited until 11:05 PM and then I went to bed. I said in a text that I didn't understand how he couldn't spare five minutes for a phone call due to great news and said I was feeling hurt. The next morning at 9:00 AM was a text from him saying, "gm, I charged the phone in my car sorry. How r u?". And the rest I've written about above.
I said I may be sweet (he calls me that), but I wasn't dumb. He said he knew that. I asked him two questions. 1. Am I wasting my time? 2. Did he love me and therefore wanted to care about me?
I haven't heard from him since yesterday at 9:30 am.
Answer clear as a bell.
I'm shocked that he chose to take a low road out. I really believed that at the least he'd offer me something like "it's not a good time for me right now...yada yada yada".
I sure know how to pick em'.
Post Script:
I should mention that I did contact him this morning.
I text this:
Me: I always told you if you're not interested let me know. I did not pull my love (like that other gf). I expressed hurt and genuine concern about us. You not contacting me is like you pulled yours. I won't contact you again. I am respecting your choice. I'm confused and sad that this is where it's at.
*The reason I write about the other girl friend is he broke off his last relationship after she told him she no longer loved him. He said that once someone pulls that out he's done. She was apparently trying to win back his affection and tried that to get a response. Because when he left, she followed him a couple days later to his work site, where he told me he refused to see her. I wanted to make it clear I'm not that chick. I didn't pull the "I don't love you", I called him on his unloving behaviour. He is fulfilling my beliefs about his feelings for me. It would be humiliating to prostrate myself at his feet. At the same time, I'm not going to let him see anger ( a secondary emotion), I want him to know I'm hurting and confused. Legit. Do I think he cares? No. Do I feel better because I closed it for myself by sending the text? Yes. I'm no longer waiting for him to contact me, and I will not longer contact him. There is some relief to be honest. I'm disappointed I don't have a future partner (right now), but I think he was either a player or just not that into me. Despite his words, he just couldn't back it up with action. I let words take me much longer which I think was complicated by the fact he lived away. No MORE long distance for me!
Post Script:
I should mention that I did contact him this morning.
I text this:
Me: I always told you if you're not interested let me know. I did not pull my love (like that other gf). I expressed hurt and genuine concern about us. You not contacting me is like you pulled yours. I won't contact you again. I am respecting your choice. I'm confused and sad that this is where it's at.
*The reason I write about the other girl friend is he broke off his last relationship after she told him she no longer loved him. He said that once someone pulls that out he's done. She was apparently trying to win back his affection and tried that to get a response. Because when he left, she followed him a couple days later to his work site, where he told me he refused to see her. I wanted to make it clear I'm not that chick. I didn't pull the "I don't love you", I called him on his unloving behaviour. He is fulfilling my beliefs about his feelings for me. It would be humiliating to prostrate myself at his feet. At the same time, I'm not going to let him see anger ( a secondary emotion), I want him to know I'm hurting and confused. Legit. Do I think he cares? No. Do I feel better because I closed it for myself by sending the text? Yes. I'm no longer waiting for him to contact me, and I will not longer contact him. There is some relief to be honest. I'm disappointed I don't have a future partner (right now), but I think he was either a player or just not that into me. Despite his words, he just couldn't back it up with action. I let words take me much longer which I think was complicated by the fact he lived away. No MORE long distance for me!
