His attractive traits:
- He does what he wants and makes no excuses or apologies. He doesn't check with me to see what I want to do, he knows what he needs to get done and ensures it gets done.
- He makes no apologies for saying sex/love making is very important and he won't compromise with a woman who places it lower down on the list.
- He doesn't concentrate on me. He recently forgot my birthday, but rather than profusely apologize he correctly stated his mind is full of crap he's dealing with (sick mom etc.). He doesn't seem big on those kind of days and would rather treat me well every day, then treat me well on one special day. I dig that.
- He never puts himself down. He's not arrogant, he acknowledges his imperfections without beating himself up about them. Pretty self-aware.
- He is comfortable naked and very open about his desires. Interested in trying new things without being embarrassed to talk about it.
- He could care less that I write a blog, shows no interest in it. I like this because if he asked I'd show him and know he would be only moderatly interested and wouldn't mind my half-naked shots being shown. He loves my sensuality and gets that its a package. He does like that I can talk about men and women's relationships and have some understanding from a man's point of view.
- He's honest about what he wants and shows transparency at times. Sometimes he's distant but as I've gotten to know him, I've come to realize it's not about me. He really appreciates my lack of pressure and when I seek reassurance he's quick to give it. He likes that once I receive it, I'm good.
- He's talked about other women, sometimes as women he's 'played with', but he's never put them down. If we break-up I know I'll be talked about affectionately.
If we were to measure him on an alpha/beta scale he scores alpha which leaves me very aware of his desirability by other women. He also knows he's desirable to other women and could have pretty much anyone he wants. That keeps me on my toes. I have to up the ante in regards to what keeps me interesting and special. I have his full attention now, I'm not going to rest on that and become complacent.
I need to:
- Keep myself hot and become even hotter. By this I mean toning and slimming myself down even more. I have a great waist/hip ratio - my waist is 10 inches smaller than my hips. I want to keep the ratio and lose four inches off both. He once dated a figure competitor (body building) and I don't come close to that, mind you I don't want to either, don't like bony chest bones. He has never complained about my body, but I know smaller would be hotter.
- Never forget that being sexual/sensual is important to him. Don't become boring in bed. Keep him interested by hinting, teasing and then doing things that he hasn't done or hasn't done the best. My goal is to be the best he's ever had. I've heard that from him twice and I know he doesn't give compliments easily, he doesn't feel he has to win my favour. When he tells me I'm hot, I believe him. Not going to lose that.
- Make sure I don't reveal every overly analytical thought that goes through my head about us. When I'm succumbing to worry about us, make sure I write it out and then delete it. The fact I don't do this makes me very attractive to him, he loves my lack of need (ha!).
- Make sure he knows how special and sexy he is. I call him my yummy man on a regular basis and he loves it. The man is the king and needs to know his woman thinks so too.
- Never lose sight of the fact I could lose the dude. Not to make me desperate or needy, but the opposite. Behaviour is critical.
- Keep myself maintained, meaning body hair and head of hair and tasteful clothes. How I look to others will be a direct reflection of how I see him. If I let myself go, it means I don't respect him. I work at how I look, I have for a long time, not planning on stopping now.
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| He loves this shirt. It was my choice for date one. |
As I was writing this he told me to call him. I did and he said he wanted to hear my voice and we talked for maybe 3 minutes. Longest calls with him last no longer than 15 and that's a stretch. He laughs at how women love to talk and men don't have much to say, it's true.
I've dated a lot of men as these pages can attest to, and I've been pretty intent on making sure I liked the guy before seeing a future. I thought many times I'd be single for the rest of my days because I couldn't seem to believe in settling. Honestly I'd still rather be single than be in a crappy relationship. That I've found a great guy and it's still going at 8 months is a testimony for knowing what you want and what you have to offer. The goal is to keep it going. Time will tell.
