Shallow Hal, aoefe style.

I've been accused in real life of being shallow.  I don't believe that'll be a stretch for most of you to believe, look at how I've set this blog up.  Pictures of me abound.  Some believe I seek validation and others think I mustn't have anything between my ears.  Firstly we are visual creatures.  We like knowing what people look like.  Think of your favourite anonymous bloggers, don't you have a picture of them in your head?  Don't you hope they don't have faces made for radio?  We fall in love with persona's on the web, we create fantasies built by their responses and posts and we picture them in our heads.  When I first started commenting at Roissy I decided to back up my claims as a datable female by posting pictures.  I wanted to be taken seriously, which is kind of ironic since I post half naked pictures of myself, but truthfully I wanted to be 'seen' as authentic.   I think I earned some respect and heck if nothing else I earned some interest.

But that's the internet, what about real life.  I have been called shallow in real life, rarely to my face, but I know that people have thought it and said it to others.  Why?  Because I dress nice and take care of myself.  I am not afraid to use gentle intervention if the situation calls for it in order to remain datable therefore I look a lot younger than I am which creates jealousy.  It's gender specific this belief of my shallowness, no surprise that it's women,  most of whom stopped taking care of themselves at the age of 30 or marriage whichever came first.  I think it also rubs some women the wrong way that I'm feminine about my approach, I wear mostly pretty dresses and heels, I don't wear slutty, tight fitting clothing which makes me harder to dismiss.

Some people have shallow attitudes, they are much more focused on the external than what takes place underneath.  Personally I believe the outer should reflect the inner.  I think beauty is important both in character and in appearance and beauty of character should be the stronger emphasis.  I know it's not my character that's being questioned and I don't say that blindly.  I am authentic about what I write here and that shows in my real life persona too.  The accusation for me simply comes from appearance.

I don't pay attention to the haters having already worked through my motivations in my own head.  I admit I like attention both here and elsewhere and if looking good helps me get it, all the better.  Looking good has many payoffs beyond the obvious, I have never been turned down for a job, I have no problem dating, I'm trusted more at first glance, I am seen as intelligent, and for the time being while my attractiveness lasts I am seen as sexually viable.  Is it worth it to work it?  Hell yea.