It's raining here, oh how I love the rain when I'm lying in bed. I live in a prairie province, which means we're fairly dry ordinarily, but this spring has been an exception. We had a long, heavy snowfall winter and the spring although decent temperature wise has been rainy. It reminds me of my East-coast upbringing and that's a good thing. As Martha Stewart says, "A very good thing."Today is Father's Day, I don't participate in any meaningful way because my Dad died years ago. I don't get depressed but I admit it makes me sad when I see all the statuses on Facebook wishing their dads a happy day. I miss my dad more when I'm reminded I don't have one.
Celebrations like Christmas and specifically targeted holidays are hard on many people, suicides are higher at these times than at others. This makes me sad. Commercials on TV/Radio and retail establishments bombard people with messages like "family is everything, love is a diamond, fathers/mothers are amazing people...". I call BS, I work in an industry that supports marginalized and vulnerable people and they have anything but loving families. Many friends I have don't have that. Truth is those messages make money. We feel if we spend enough we'll be loved or forgiven or remembered.
I know there's only one investment I want to make and it's not going to benefit strangers aka business owners, it's relationship investment. The people you talk to, respond to, encourage and vent to are your future. Relationship is not supposed to be one-way either. Don't hang yourself up on investing in people who can't reciprocate. I don't suggest you cut them out of your life, but don't get caught up on waiting for the return. Healthy relationships give back immediately. They don't make you feel bad about who you are, they don't ignore you, they don't suck you dry.
I realize I haven't invested as much with family and friends over the last few years due to serious and stressful job demands. My spare time was spent either dating or writing and reading blogs, I escaped life in some respects. Now that I'm home every day, it's like I'm seeing things that were right in front of me. I have no regrets, because it's a waste of time, but I am excited at what's ahead and what I can develop and nourish in my present relationships. My sister arrives from the East tomorrow, I haven't seen her in over two years, I haven't spoken to her in almost as long, we communicate infrequently in Facebook messages. I miss her and plan to tell her that, I plan to tell her I've been remiss in communicating with her and that I own at least half of our failure to grow our relationship.
Long story short if you have a Dad who's a poop-head, don't be sad, it's not your fault. You own your own relationships, go out and grow some. I plan to. (lying in bed makes me all sappy I guess)
