But Nobody Will Hire Me!
That’s ridiculous. You have two degrees. You have more education than most people….
But Nobody Will Hire Me!
You are a "Generalist" . The law degree makes you versatile, and you can go anywhere.
But Nobody Will Hire Me!
When I worked for the Heavy Construction Company, one of the Executives was a lawyer. But he didn' t practice!
That was then, and good for him. But Now, Nobody Will Hire Me!
Your cousin is working for the Power Company and he’s a just a stupid guy, and he owns his own home.
But Nobody Will Hire Me!
Your running around doing work like a person that didn’t finish High School.
But Nobody Will Hire Me!
Did you call that Career Coach your Father told you about. She might be able to help you.
She Wants A Thousand Dollars And I Don't Have It!
Look at that man down the street. He’s a real simpleton and he has two cars and owns a farm upstate.
But Nobody Will Hire Me!
Did you try the Cable Company?
I Did, And They Don't Want Me!
Did you try Verizon?
They Don't Want Me Either!
You should be working in an office…..
But Nobody Will Hire Me!
Put on your Suit and just walk in, and start handing out Resumes.
I Tried That, And Was Stopped By Security. Besides, That's Not The Way You Do It!
I don’t believe it. You have two degrees..
But Nobody Will Hire Me!
You didn’t try hard enough. You just gave up and…..
But Nobody Will Hire Me!
What about the Power Company?
They Don't Want Me!
Did you call your father’s friend at the Hospital?
He Doesn't Want To Know Me!
How about my friend Marge?
She Doesn't Want To Know Me Either, And Besides, She Is Half Senile!
Did you try a headhunter? They do all the work for you you know. They want to because they get paid if they get you a job.
I Did, About A Dozen, And All Around The Country, And They Never Call Back!
How About an employment office?
I Went To All Of Them!
A temp agency? Sometimes temps lead to full time jobs.
Yes, And They Don't Want To Hire Me!
Allstate, Geico. Geico told me not to apply again for a year. Travelers, State Farm Locally, State Farm in Ballston Spa, AIG, The Hartford, Progressive, A few Risk Retention Groups, the top 100 Public Companies on Long Island, the top 200 Companies on Long Island, On bonded paper, by e-mail, on Monster.com, on Careerbuilder.com. Directly on the Corporate websites. Sending resumes cold. An oil refinery in St. Croix, The NY Times Classifed, Jobs in NY CIty. Jobs on Long Island. Jobs in New Jersey. Jobs all across the country and..................................
I searched by Industry, buy Job title, by going through the phone book A to Z. By going through the classifieds A to Z. I even got a list of Insurance Company's from the AM Best Website and wrote to almost all of them with my resume.
Manager Jobs. Compliance Jobs. Paralegal Jobs, Claims jobs, Underwriting, Bank telling, Fund raising and Development. In house legal Dept's. Hospitals, Banks, Real Estate Management Companies...........the list goes on and on...............(At that point, I started panting like Mel Gibson during a phone meltdown)
AND NO ONE WANTS TO HIRE ME!
You have two degrees for Christ's Sake. You went to Law School.
And The School Was Bottom Of The Barrel and I Was At The Bottom Of The Class! The Bottom of The Bottom!
That doesn't matter. All that matters is that you got the degree. No one asks where you went to school, or what your grades were.
Maybe When You Were Younger, But They Do Now!
That's ridiculous. There's lots of law firms out there. Did my friend, the partner ever get back to you?
No, And I Don't Know Why. Maybe It's The Law School I Went To. Some Say The Place Is A Diploma "Mill".
What about a job as a Paralegal. You can at least do that? You can't tell me your school isn;t at least as good as any Paralegal School.
A JD is Poison for a Paralegal Job. The Industry Got Wise To The Situation A Long Time Ago. The Want Ad's For Paralegals say: "JD's Need Not Apply" In So Many Words.
I don’t understand what’s wrong with you. Your attitude is terrible. You spent all that time and money. Youv’e got a good mind and its going to waste.
But Nobody Will Hire Me!
You’re the first one in the family to have a Law Degree.
But Nobody Will Hire Me!
You’re so smart. You’re the smartest one of my children.
But Nobody Will Hire Me!
Such a wasted life.
But Nobody Will Hire Me!
Maybe your can get you a job with the Transit Authority.
I Tried, and They won't hire me.
How about the Bus company?
I Tried Them Too!
Stop shouting. You don’t have to shout. You know, you have a bad temper.
I’m not shouting. I’m just trying to get you to believe,
Nobody Will Hire Me!
Nobody Will Hire Me!
Nobody Will Hire Me!
Oh, by the way, theStudent Loan people called here today. They call here three times a day looking for you. Get them to stop calling.....................
* (OK. I think it's done now.) This post represents a dramatization of a typical, though not an actual transcript of a telephone or in- person conversation with one or both of my parents during the period between graduation from Law School and the break-up of my marriage.
It is my hope that many law grads out there will not experience the same lack of success in seeking both legal and non-legal employment, and will not then have to resort to working menial jobs for bare subsistence. (As the Student Loans just get bigger, and bigger, and bigger, and their credit score becomes irrevocably destroyed as a consequence).
