I love all things beautiful. I am a natural aesthetic - whatever that really means. I suppose to me it means I have an innate sense of what is or isn't. Maybe that's all of us? I don't know I just know I like to be surrounded by beauty whether in nature or in decor.
I have always viewed myself flawed. I have a beautiful mouth of which I'm sure readers know I know - judging by the superfluous amount of lip pics on this site. It's an uncommonly full natural lip which celebrities pay a fortune to obtain and don't. I have beautiful eyes, not too wide, nor to far apart, my eyebrows are naturally shaped and I haven't had to pluck them or wax them for many years. I have a nice jawline - feminine enough and yet not weak.
What stops me from being a real beauty in every sense of the word is my nose. Repeated visits to plastic surgeons to have this fixed have met with refusal at every turn. My nose is not fixable. It's a fat nose not a cartilagous nose meaning in order to slim it, they'd have to scar it horribly and then I'd be walking around with a disfigured face.
This fixation with beauty and my lack of has created more problems than I care to talk about here - let's just say I'm over sensitive to critique.
I post this picture of my full face because in it I recognize that despite its flaw it is beautiful in its own way. Perhaps I can begin the healing process -not surgical healing but emotional.
Late edit [I recognize I'm a flawed human being, the flaw I was referring to directly in this post is beauty. I am not hoping for praise. I am not hoping for anything in this post it is more a deep confession and one I haven't revealed anywhere before now - it feels good to say it out loud].
This picture is the same one from above - see the difference dark and light shadows can make. I find it fascinating.
